What July 4 Means to this Canadian

July 4, 2013.

I found my resolve. Strength. Independence. That my ex could no longer trample upon.

I write this not to “get things off my chest” but to hopefully inspire someone that feels is in a lost or hopeless relationship, they can do it. It may take time, planning, support from friends & family but it can be done. If you are in an abusive relationship (everything from control issues, cheaters to financial, emotional, verbal & physical abuse and all points in between) you can get out. You should get out. You owe it to yourself, your friends & family. If you have children, you definitely owe it to them. This applies to both men and women.

I had taken a new position with better pay and was really happy about that. All the ex could say was “Well, that’s great but it’s not nearly enough money. I need you to be making $XX,XXXX.” Suffice to say I won’t disclose the amount but is a very healthy salary.

Huh. I wasn’t making enough money for HIM?!? What’s wrong with him getting a better paying job? Why does it have to be me doing it all? I did all the errands; always drove us everywhere; paid for everything; had all of the “responsibilities” in my name; did the laundry; took care of the dogs; did all the housework & large majority of the cooking. Yet I wasn’t doing enough. Providing enough. Wow.

Almost two years previous to that I had had enough of the attitude and six months after that (sadly, during Christmas holidays 2011) melted down and told him I wanted a divorce. I did not plan on him becoming violent and threatening me. So, I stayed. Biding my time. For me, it was the safest thing to do. I already had my own bank account but started having my pay go into that one as opposed to the joint one. Why? Because my pay was being spent on eBay before the money came in. Often there wasn’t enough to buy food & pay bills. It became one or the other. You can imagine what happened when the discovery was made that I’d only transfer in the required amount for mortgage, taxes, etc. and pay the rest from my account.

Did I mention I was not allowed to touch his money?

Yeah. Nice huh? He used his money for beer. Going for lunch every day and drinks after. Smokes. Generally having a good time kinda stuff.  Had been yelled at a few times about “not touching his money”. That’s love right there folks. I may sound a bit bitter but I’m more thankful for it. It’s taught me to be wary of people so hopefully I won’t get screwed again. I do not want my heart broken again. I’m sure it will happen but I’ll be far better prepared for it.

So, after that last “you need to make me more money” childish outburst, I’d had it. Done. No more. Start making exit plan.

Believe it or not I completely forgot my anniversary this year. Weeks had passed before I realised it. Oops.

I am very thankful I have a few close friends and a very knowing and supportive family. Some had seen how things deteriorated over the years and were thankful when I said I was out. Finally. I waited and planned and got out. Safely. Yes there were things I forgot. I did manage to retrieve them safely. He changed the locks as soon as I left, of course and my BFF busted him on Plenty of Fish the day after I moved out (all the while begging me to come back and fix things). All the lies, secrets, games & overall BS of over 12 years together has conditioned me. I am simply not able to tolerate that any longer. It all hurt but I’m stronger for it. I’m also thankful that this is an anniversary I will remember.

Independence Day has a marvelous ring to it. One I will quietly celebrate each year for the rest of my life. As a Canadian.

Peace & Love (and I sincerely mean this)

Peanut Butter Nutella Swirl Cookies

So easy, so good. Makes about 3 dozen cookies.

Preheat your oven to 350 F (180 C). You’ll need two bowls for this – about the same size as you’ll be splitting the dough.

1/3 C Butter

½ C Brown Sugar

¼ C White Sugar

½ C Peanut Butter

½ C Nutella

1 Egg

1 C Flour

1 Tsp Baking Soda

Mix your sugars together. This way, if the brown sugar has any clumps, they get broken up easily. Then, cream together the butter, sugars and egg. Once well mixed, add your flour & baking soda. When that is well mixed, separate half of it into the other bowl before adding your peanut butter to one half and the Nutella to the other bowl. Again, when well mixed, take about a ½ teaspoon-sized chunk of the peanut butter mix spooned into your palm and the same of the Nutella mix – flatten together and fold over a couple times. Roughly shape into a circle and place on the pan. They will be about 1.5” across when placed on your cookie sheet and double when baked.

Bake for 10 minutes & enjoy!

Pan-Seared Lamb Chops /w Oven Roasted Herbed Potatoes & Assorted Veg

I had a request to post the recipe for last night’s dinner which I’m happy to oblige but it’s more instructions that it is an actual recipe. With that clarified, here’s the shopping list you’ll need for two people (double etc. for more people).

2 6 oz. Lamb chops (one half to one inch thick each)

2 C small potatoes, quartered

1 C peas and 1 C corn (or mixed vegetables, asparagus, vegetables of choice)

½ Ea sweet bell peppers (two or three colours)

5 or 6 large white mushrooms

4 to 6 Stuffed mammoth olives

2 oz feta cheese

½ oz Fig and balsamic vinegar

2 Tbsp olive oil

2 Tbsp butter

½ Tsp rosemary

Salt and pepper to taste

Do not marinate the chops ahead of time. The balsamic will literally cook the meat before you put it in a pan.

Do your prep ahead of time – even the day before. Cut your small potatoes into quarters and put into a bowl a bit at a time. Drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with rosemary, salt & pepper at each layer. Once they’re all cut up, give it all a good stir. Slice up the fresh mushrooms and mix them in with the potatoes when you’re ready to wrap them. It’s fine to let these sit for a while before wrapping them in foil and going into the oven (350 F for 60 minutes). 

If you’re pressed for time, microwave them in the bowl for about 7 minutes on high prior to wrapping in foil. You can cut the time in the oven by half by doing this. When microwaving them, quickly pan-fry the mushrooms. By the time the potatoes come out of the microwave, the mushrooms will be ready to mix with them.

Season your veg however you like. If you want to foil wrap them and throw them on the BBQ (potatoes for that matter too), by all means do so. Otherwise, normal cooking times apply.

For the sweet bell peppers, cut them across the bottom horizontally so you get “rings”. Layer one colour then another etc. along the plates until you have the desired amount set out (depends how hungry each person is, really). Sprinkle generously with feta cheese and a little salt & pepper.

Timing is everything and so it is with this. When you’re potatoes and veg are about ¾ of the way to being cooked, start your chops.

Now for the lamb. Heat your pan first before putting anything in the pan. If you have one that can go directly int he oven, even better. Otherwise you’ll need an oven-proof dish to finish the chops in. Temp should be medium or 5 or 6 if using an electric range. Put a tablespoon of the olive oil in the now very warm pan and about 1.5 teaspoons of the fig balsamic vinegar. Ensure you spread this around the pan so it’s not pooling in any one place just before you put the chops in. 

Place the chops in the pan – it will be sizzling – and cover for about 2 minutes with the lid to keep it from spitting hot oil & vinegar onto the stove top & counter. Pull the lid, turn over and cover for another 2 minutes. There should be a nice, light caramelization on it. Before going into the oven, drizzle lightly with a bit more of the fig balsamic and some more of the olive oil. If you have an oven-proof pan you’ve seared the chops in, place the whole thing right into the oven for 15 minutes. If not, transfer to an oven-proof dish and put into the oven for 15 minutes. 

If doing on the grill, sear on high (450-500F) for 1 minute each side (reduce heat to low when you flip to other side). Close the lid for approximately 6-8 minutes if directly over the heat and about 12 to 15 if using indirect heat at 350F. I recommend indirect but that’s just my preference when cooking lamb.

When the chops come off the grill or out of the oven, let them rest for a few minutes. This has the added benefit of allowing you the time to dish the potatoes and other veg onto the plates. Chops go on last. You don’t have to have any type of sauce with this particular preparation but if you want to, by all means, pick your seasoning/jelly/sauce of choice.

This sounds more complex than it really is and it’s really about preparation and timing. If you’re well organized, you’ll have this all done right around or under an hour. Have fun, enjoy, play with different flavours but nothing too strong as it will easily over-power the meat (and everything else). Happy eating!

Peace & Love

Getting Baked

This is not what you were thinking.

I bake because it feels good to do it. I only started really baking about two years ago. I’ve kicked that can a few times over the years but nothing like what I’ve been doing. I bake about once a week now and thankfully I have people to share it with. I’ll try just about anything at least once. I’ve learned to create my own recipes. Somewhat trepidatiously at times but I still am willing to venture there.

I hope my grandparents would be proud. My grandmother was a phenomenal baker as was my grandfather. He was the blue-ribbon baker for Purity Mills but because it was during a time when the man worked and the woman stayed home. He was the bread and award winner (pun intended). We would show up during summer vacation when I was little and there was grandma pulling fresh, hot cream puffs out of the oven to let them cool just enough to pipe them full of real whipped cream. Every child’s dream. My mother was a fantastic baker too. She had this chocolate cake recipe that was out of this world. Wish I had that recipe to this day but sadly, I don’t.

I have however, crafted my own chocolate-based dessert – my No-bake Milk Chocolate Cheesecake. I’ve done a couple versions of it now: one with an Oreo cookie crust and the other done with my own brownie recipe. The brownie crust wins hands-down. It’s slightly chewy with a rich, chocolate flavour. Puts an extra chocolate kick to it while providing another texture to the soft, cheesecake. I incorporate two recipes into one dessert and from first-hand reports, is a winner. Which makes me very happy.

For me, the whole point of baking is to bring a little enjoyment into a person’s life. A savoury smile. A satisfied sigh. Eyes closed. For just a few moments then on to the next bite. Repeat. Then it’s done. Hopefully with little or no guilt attached to it. You shouldn’t feel guilty about having something like this. Even daily. I do. If it’s not the cheesecake, it’s my brownies or maybe cookies or muffins. Pastries even. But I cheat on that and buy the pre-made puff pastry. Sure I could make my own but I know where my strengths lie and it’s not making pastry from scratch. I leave that to the experts.

I’ve recently – and I take this seriously & humbly – been asked by several people I know to consider doing a cookbook. I have enough of my own recipes to have a healthy start to it and expand over the next several months. I was really honoured that they would even request/suggest such a thing. Sure I’ll throw in some of my old stand-bys such as baked ham with peaches, white onion & ginger (a favourite of my family I get requested to do often), poutine with onion rings and swiss cheese and there’s my slow-cooker mushroom gravy bombs but I think the real heart of it will be about desserts. The stuff we leave just enough room for or swap out for dinner altogether. Trust me. I’ve done that. Dessert first then dinner. Or skipped the dinner part completely.

There really is so much you can do with a few ingredients that lands a smile on so many faces. For me, that is the thing that makes it all so very worth it.

Peace & Love

No-Bake, Milk Chocolate, Milk Chocolate Chip Cheesecake

May 19/14 UPDATE: The peanut butter cup version is at the bottom of the page.

For those that know me, they know I'm always up for cooking and baking. Especially if I can create my own recipe. The one that follows is one such challenge I threw to myself and I'm so very happy with the results.

Crust

2 C       Oreo Cookie or Graham Cookie Crumbs

½ C      Butter, melted

¼ C      Sugar (optional)

Combine ingredients and press into spring-form pan across the bottom & up the sides. Place in 350 F oven for 8 minutes. Cool completely. May be placed in fridge for 30 minutes to speed this process.

Filling

Combine in a small bowl and set aside to add to filling mixture as it’s being mixed.

1 C       Cocoa

½ C      Sugar

In a stand mixer (or large bowl using a hand, beater-style mixer) combine the following:

2 C       Cream cheese (two regular-sized packages) Regular or Light versions will work

1.5 C    Sour cream

2 Tsp    Vanilla extract

1 C       Chocolate chips (regular or milk)

Start mixer on low/slow and add a tablespoon at a time of the cocoa mixture until it’s all mixed in and creamy. You will need to stop the mixer and spoon/spatula the mixture off the blade(s) into the bowl a couple times. Once it’s all combined and very creamy (about 8 minutes), clean the blade(s) again and add in the chocolate chips. Combine until thoroughly mixed (about 2 minutes).

Pull cooled crust from fridge and scoop the filling into it, smoothing it out. Set aside while the topping is made.

Topping

1 pkg    Instant chocolate pudding (or change it up by using, vanilla, banana, etc)

2 C       Real whipping cream

This couldn’t get easier. After washing the mixing bowl & using cold water to rinse beater(s) & bowl (refrigerate if possible - helps whipping cream from "breaking"), pour in the whipping cream and slowly add the pudding mixture. Beat on low/medium until light, fluffy & completely mixed with no lumps.

Scoop out onto the cheesecake mixture and smooth with spatula right to the edges. Garnish with a few of the remaining chocolate chips (from package) nuts or fresh fruit. Put in fridge for at least 4 hours to set up properly.

This is definitely a dessert you can make a day ahead. If you want to do a smaller version, cut all ingredients in half and use a 9” pie pan.

As mentioned if you wanted to change the flavour up, you could substitute the chocolate chips for 1.5 cups mashed banana (well-drained pineapple, mandarins, pears, etc.). Use a complimentary pudding with the whipped cream for the topping and add fruit to top off instead of chocolate chips (or slivered almonds, pecans, walnuts, etc.). If you're using an acidic fruit like orange or pineapple, ensure it's well drained and almost dried to avoid the possibility of curdling the mixture.

Peanut Butter Cup Version
Variations on a theme. This works for so many things. It's really marvelous when it applies to food.
 

The filling is essentially the same except swap the cocoa for 3 heaping tablespoons of peanut butter. To counter-balance the saltiness you could add 1/4 cup more sugar bringing the total to 3/4 cup for the filling. There's plenty enough in the topping and other additions. I replaced the chocolate chips with 15 mini peanut butter cups, cut into quarters and blended in as the filling mixture was ready. Fill the pan with your mixture & set aside.

Once your mixing bowl & beater are washed and cooled, pour the whipping cream in and follow the above directions for the topping. This particular time, I used a couple brownies (I made with left-over mixture for the base) and broke them up into the topping just as it was finishing and ready to be spread on the cake.

Enjoy!!

Peace & Love

Currant & Pecan Cinnamon Rolls

You’ll need a medium-sized ziplock-type container to start this in. Easy to double/triple the batches as well. The longer you can let this mixture soak, the better it is. You’ll need to pick up a package of pre-made puff pastry in your local grocery store freezer section. I really like the Presidents Choice Butter puff pastry. If you know what you’re doing and you’re really confident, make your own.

1 c        Currants (or raisins)

.5 c       Pecans (crushed up)

1 small bottle of Captain Morgan’s Spiced Rum (about an ounce)

1 small bottle of Cinnamon Schnapps (about an ounce)

1 tbsp    Cinnamon

.25 tsp  Powdered ginger

2 tbsp    Brown (or white) sugar

Once you’ve mixed everything together, let it soak as long as possible as you’ll want the liquid to reconstitute the currants and be absorbed by the pecans as well. I let mine sit for almost a week, stirring it a couple times a day.

When you’re ready to get things rolling ensure about ½ cup of butter is at room temperature and you have at least one sheet of the puff pastry thawed and ready to go – double batch, use both/two. Set the oven to 375F to preheat.

Unroll the pastry onto a clean, dry surface and separate it from the parchment, top-side down (drier side actually so it won’t stick to the counter). Carefully spoon the mixture on to the pastry working from edge to edge but leave about 1” closest to you untouched. It’ll be about 1/8” thick when completely spread out. Take a long (chef’s) knife and cut about ¼” butter and place it near the leading edge of the mixture. Repeat this about three or four more times so you have a strip of butter running from side to side.

When you’re ready to roll it up, pull the side closest to you and “wrap” it over the top of the butter & mixture. Carefully & slowly starting at one end, start rolling it all up. Start with left and work to the right or vice versa then give it another roll until it’s all done. When it’s rolled into a “log” form, cut it into 2” to 2.5” pieces and place cut side down on the baking sheet.

 

Put it in your 375F oven for 30 minutes. If you’re doing a double batch, do them one after another.

You can put whatever type of frosting or topping on it you like. I might recommend something slightly salty though. Happy snacking!

Peace & Love

What Passes for Personal Safety for Kids in Schools - Really??

This one comes via a dear friend of mine and an incident that happened to his young son (8) at school yesterday. It infuriated me. Made me cry. J sent me the pictures of 8's wound before and after he was stitched up. They are horrific and I will not share them (never mind protecting 8's identity). Suffice to say, I'm angry about this. Here's J's post from Facebook:

I'm kinda pissed off. We get phone call from 8's teacher saying he fell down the stairs and he may need stitches. A shows up and he has a HUGE gash on his head. I go and pick up daughter from school and ask the teacher where 8 fell and how it happened. The teachers make grade 2 students walk down the stairs carrying laptops with both hands so they have no hands for the railing or support themselves. And when they fall forward they can't save their heads from the steel railing. Which causes a split large enough to see his skull. 3 stitches on the inside and 6 on the out. A took pics but to graphic for here. Maybe I should call a lawyer. I just feel like its wrong. What do you guys think?

Anyone else see what's wrong with this scenario? Why are the KIDS made responsible for carrying laptops down a know problem staircase with both hands on the laptop and none to protect their safety? Excellent question. I'm waiting to hear what the school (in Okotoks) has to say about their policy on this and when they plan to change it. And they had best change it. The teachers should be responsible for the protection of school-owned equipment and not the students. Particularly when it compromises the safety of the students. 

I have a boat-load of questions on this. How many other children have been hurt similarly, doing this? Were their injuries less, equally or more sever than 8's? Are they head injuries also or broken bones in other parts of their poor, little bodies? What will it take to change this policy? Why do they not have laptop bags for the kids to carry them in - at the very least - if they're worried about a teacher having to transport them and liability issues surrounding that? Why is the "property" not insured against accidental damage (as in dropping it to prevent serious bodily damage)? Does a child have to sustain brain damage before this changes? Does a child have to die before this changes? Good god I hope not. Wrongful death suits happen and no one wins.

Should we teach kids about personal accountability for things like computers they have to use? Yes. At potential, great personal risk? Absolutely not. There is no common sense being used here. Folks work in all kinds of environments and heath & safety is a huge concern in every workplace these days. It's a billions-of-dollars-a-year industry. So why not in the schools? Why do we feel our kids are exempt from the health & safety aspect? We shouldn't. We really shouldn't. This is the perfect opportunity to teach them that it is most definitely an important issue and taking every measurable step to ensure they learn those lessons. This is a fail far beyond epic proportions. 

If your company or organisation has laptop bags that are being "retired", please tell someone about this story and get them donated to this school so no other child - possibly your own - never goes through this. You would hate to get that one phone call your child was seriously injured at school because they carried a laptop down some stairs and fell. Not being able to protect themselves.

Peace & Love